Showing posts from March, 2016

I'm not aloof, I'm terrified.

I live inside my head to a certain extent. As with anyone, my perspective of the world is from my own viewpoint. Everything I see and hear is filtered through my perceiver, the brain. Therefore everything is tainted with my thoughts and opinions.
Most of what I remember from my travels through my life is what I thought of each experience. That includes anything I said to anyone, as that is the only thing I have control over, and so it's the thing I give the most thought to. 
I tend to by hypercritical of myself and everything I say. I'm not so hard on myself when it comes to the things I do, as I feel that I do a decent job of things, and I seem to get it right a fair amount of the time. It's the things I say to people that really get on my nerves.
I have a bit of what they nowadays call a social anxiety disorder. To this I would like to pose the general question as it relates to human beings and the way they process things in their minds: what is order? A disorder implies th…